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Do you think child support should be based on lifestyle or the direct costs associated with raising the child?

Posted in Child Support on 5th June 2014

Do you think child support should be based on lifestyle or the direct costs associated with raising the child?
When it comes to child support, do you think that it should be based on lifestyle/trickle down economics?. This is where the non-custodial parent pays the custodial parent money beyond what is needed for the day to day costs associated with raising the child. For example, if the non-custodial parent is wealthy, they may be ordered to pay in excess of $ 20,000 dollars a month. The theory is that by improving the custodial parent’s lifestyle, it will trickle down to the child.

On the other hand, some states like Texas cap child support at approximately $ 1,700 dollars per month, with the only exception being if the child is ill or something to that effect. This represents their view that child support is designed as “support,” not as “lifestyle to which they are accustomed” payment or a windfall for the custodial parent. So parents who earn more than $ 132,000 per year will generally pay the same amount of child support as someone who earns $ 1,000,000 or more per year.

Which method of child support do you agree with and why?.

Best answer(s):

Answer by Musta Krakish
women agree with the first, men agree with the second.

Answer by Lula
I don’t think men should have to pay any child support. In fact, I think men should relinquish their rights as parents completely.

Answer by Pearl
I’m just interested in what the absent parent says to the kid when the kid asks “hey, how come I had to get a second hand bike on ebay when you live in a mansion”.

Answer by Ya Coffee
The vast majority of people are not rich like in your examples and barely makes ends meet as it is.

Support payments are not that much at least in Canada. “As of March 31, 2012, the median monthly amount of a regular child or spousal support payment across the nine jurisdictions was $ 331, an increase of about 4% from the previous year.” Even paying for another bedroom in your apartment can cost this much. It does in NO way cover all expenses for a child – food, shelter, school supplies, books, transportation and clothing.

Even if this is only a small portion of what it costs, only “two-thirds of beneficiaries receive a full support payment each month” of this amount. This leaves huge numbers of household in dire poverty and that is not acceptable.

If a parent is very rich and forces his child to live in poverty, there will be a lot of issues later in life when he has to explain his selfishness to his deprived child.

Answer by Molly
I agree with Pearl. Why should a child have to wear clothes from the thrift store when the parent gets his/hers at Gucci? It’s the least an absent parent can do after not being there to help raise their own child.

Answer by Grace Under Fire
The actual cost of raising a child. Though I would say that might vary widely by area or lifestyle. For example, if the parents are very wealthy, then what’s considered “normal” would look very different than that of a middle-income couple. I think it should be negotiated, taking many things into account.

Answer by InvincibleFudgePotatoe
i really think child support should not be pressed on , i mean it’s the mother fault for getting pregnant with who ever she slept with , child support is nothing but to get money . The single parent need to know how to support themselves and child , if they can’t support , then adoption . My bio farther use his child support from my mother , on his own personal needs .

Answer by Don’t click on me
why do men hate their child?

Answer by Integration 20
I like the cap Texas law uses.

There’s no reason to hand money over to the custodial parent in order to improve her lifestyle.

If the non custodial parent would like to spend extra on his child, it should not need to be filtered through the mother.

In essence the people of this forum are stating that care for a child goes beyond meeting its needs. The non custodial parent is required to splurge a certain percent of his income on the child by enhancing the mother’s income.

Answer by Brady
I agree with capping child support. Once the child’s basic needs are taken care of, that should be it. Women need to get jobs if they want to live in big houses and drive nice cars. Texas has the right idea!

Should I dump my boyfriend?

Posted in Babysitting on 21st May 2014

Should I dump my boyfriend?
Me and my boyfriend have been together for a year and two months. His family didn’t want us to be together for religious reasons but he left his family for me. He is really good to me but I think he’s kind of irresponsible. He doesn’t have a job (even though he is trying to get one) and he is always getting overdraft fees in our bank account. He is always forgetting to do things and just procrastinates them. He is also always stuck babysitting. He isn’t doing well in college but wants to be a neurosurgeon. He has big ambitions but it doesn’t seem like he is working hard to get to them. We also argue a lot. I don’t know what to do. We want to get married but I don’t know how long it would last because of all that and his family might come in the middle again. What would you do?

Best answer(s):

Answer by Vinod P

Answer by Wendell Horsashire
Hmm, well, to begin,
I think him leaving his overzealous family for you is super. (+1)

No job…this is hard. because, the joint bank account combined with the lack of job is a double negative…but if you were to acquire your OWN bank account with your OWN money because YOU have a job,And you dont care about image (the image other people would have of you because your husband doesnt have a job) then its O.K, and if you got your own bank account it would be a 0. Also, I know for a fact that medical school leaves little to no time for work. You dont say what level of college he is at, only that he is planning to be a neurosurgeon (big ambitions – +1),
but since you say he isnt doing well and doesnt study (-1)
I assume he is not studying or spending all his time shadowing a physician. That is when those in medical school REALLY do not have a spare moment for work – when they get the little buzzer and are on call when a doctor is on call to see how the workforce operates. -1 because I think he should be able to have a job.

“He always gets stuck baby sitting”. I think you must mean he doesnt have the guts to stand up to whoever is making him babysit. -1.

Forgetting? O.K. Not a negative quality, I think. A pretty relationship neutral one, unless he forgets your anniversary or something.Forget
-fulness is just a thing more specific to your husband, so unless this quality constantly irks you I wouldnt see it as a weight on judging someone so important.

Procrastinating…see last part above about personal qualities ^

Arguments, -1.

Marital-religious issues, a neutral. Either A) skip it [the only benefit I ever see is tax deduction] or B) work your way through it because I am positive that if he chose being with you over offending his family/religion once, he will do it again.



Conclusion: Do not dump him.

Is this normal for my girlfriend or should I end it?

Posted in Babysitting on 9th May 2014

Is this normal for my girlfriend or should I end it?
my girlfriend and I were at a party and we were talking about how much fun it would be, but at the party she barley talked or payed any attention to me but she would always be with her friends and we kissed a few times but it felt rushed… what should I do is this normal? do girls just generally pay less attention to their boyfriends when around friends??

Best answer(s):

Answer by Bob Crap
If they’re guy friends you’re in trouble buddy

Answer by Lina
Yikes! Sometimes we do. But hey, tell her about it. Ask her why she was barely with you. Let her know you don’t like it. Perhaps she’ll understand. She shouldn’t be ignoring you though. That’s not right and I know it feels horrible. Like I’ve stated, remind her that you’re her boyfriend, and she should pay attention to you also! If things continue well it might be best to end it >.<

Answer by DTKB
Kevan, the quickest way to lose a girl is to be clingy and possessive. Nobody likes to feel as though they have to “take care of” and/or “babysit” their boyfriend (or girlfriend) at a party. It is no fun!

Besides, everybody hates the couple that cannot be apart from each other at a party for more than 2 seconds—it SCREAMS insecurity and its weird and gross. Your girlfriend came by and checked on you—even kissed you a couple of times. It felt rushed? Maybe your girlfriend is not into that clingy PDA kind of thing. You are free man—why didn’t you go around and chat it up with some of the other people at the party? There had to be plenty of people you knew and tons of people who you’ve yet to meet. A party is a place to circulate and interact with other people. She was having a good time with her friends—its not as though she was chasing after men all night long.

You came together, you met up together a few times during the party, and who did she leave the party with???? She left with you. You need to do is get a life and not depend on your girlfriend to entertain you 24/7 like the town clown.