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My ex came back, but lives with another woman?

Posted in Working Mothers on 6th December 2010

My ex came back, but lives with another woman?
My ex boyfriend and I have been on and off of our relationship for the past 8months. He’s 6yrs older then me but isn’t a problem in the relationship. We’ve known each other for over 3yrs.
The beginning of the relationship things were going great, we were madly in love and we pretty much started to live together (a little more into the relationship) but then things happened and he broke things off.
As of recent we have been working on us for a little over a month now and things have been better, we know things aren’t going sour like it use to be. However, he moved out of his apartment that use to be local to where I live. Now he lives over an hour away, works at a bar, and lives with another woman.
I’m not allowed to go to his bar, at all. He lives with this woman (who is older then him and a “mother” like woman) who also works at the same bar he does but “works at different hours” then he does, so he claims. I never once am invited to go see him, he usually makes the effort to see me.
So I can’t understand why he’d go to this trouble to get me back into his life if he’s living with someone else and possibly hiding something. Someone, please help me because this ‘relationship’ or lack of is really making everyday harder for me.
he also finds reasons for EVERYTHING. Example: If I can’t go to the bar it’s because his manager will “get drunk and hit on me which will cause problems” or when I want to talk, he’s sick, tired, phone died, didn’t hear it…it’s always SOMETHING!

Best answer(s):

Answer by Christian Serrano
Lauren your waisting your time if its on and off its obviously too many dang problems between you and him hes not the only guy in the world. If hes not inviting you there is obviously a reason why he isnt think about it

Answer by PEGGY S
If you are not completely a part of his life, how can you say things are working out? Sounds to me that your bf is full of sh*t, and you need to move on and find a real man that has no secrets.

Answer by metulchik
I hate to say it, but it sounds like he and this other woman have something going on, and he doesn’t want you to know about it. Maybe he doesn’t want her to know about you either. (do you ever call his house, do you know if she knows you even exist?).
I would talk to him about it, and let him know that you want things to work, that you think trust is important in a relationship, but you are having a hard time trusting him fully when he keeps so much of his life private from you….see what he says. If he still doesn’t invite you over or make an attempt to share his world with you then he is hiding something.
If all else fails, send a friend he hasn’t met to the bar he works at. Or break the rule and show up yourself. Or show up at his house unannounced (with flowers or some romantic “surprise”).

Answer by Surender KumarK
In human life first ex is ever better,no one can forget to each other, even there may be lot of misunderstndings ,but both of them should forget their past,if ex is coming back u must welcome him,becouse life verry short.

Answer by Dongle
I manage that bar and I WILL absolutely hit on you. And you will LIKE IT!