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Do you think child support should be based on lifestyle or the direct costs associated with raising the child?

Posted in Child Support on 5th June 2014

Do you think child support should be based on lifestyle or the direct costs associated with raising the child?
When it comes to child support, do you think that it should be based on lifestyle/trickle down economics?. This is where the non-custodial parent pays the custodial parent money beyond what is needed for the day to day costs associated with raising the child. For example, if the non-custodial parent is wealthy, they may be ordered to pay in excess of $ 20,000 dollars a month. The theory is that by improving the custodial parent’s lifestyle, it will trickle down to the child.

On the other hand, some states like Texas cap child support at approximately $ 1,700 dollars per month, with the only exception being if the child is ill or something to that effect. This represents their view that child support is designed as “support,” not as “lifestyle to which they are accustomed” payment or a windfall for the custodial parent. So parents who earn more than $ 132,000 per year will generally pay the same amount of child support as someone who earns $ 1,000,000 or more per year.

Which method of child support do you agree with and why?.

Best answer(s):

Answer by Musta Krakish
women agree with the first, men agree with the second.

Answer by Lula
I don’t think men should have to pay any child support. In fact, I think men should relinquish their rights as parents completely.

Answer by Pearl
I’m just interested in what the absent parent says to the kid when the kid asks “hey, how come I had to get a second hand bike on ebay when you live in a mansion”.

Answer by Ya Coffee
The vast majority of people are not rich like in your examples and barely makes ends meet as it is.

Support payments are not that much at least in Canada. “As of March 31, 2012, the median monthly amount of a regular child or spousal support payment across the nine jurisdictions was $ 331, an increase of about 4% from the previous year.” Even paying for another bedroom in your apartment can cost this much. It does in NO way cover all expenses for a child – food, shelter, school supplies, books, transportation and clothing.

Even if this is only a small portion of what it costs, only “two-thirds of beneficiaries receive a full support payment each month” of this amount. This leaves huge numbers of household in dire poverty and that is not acceptable.

If a parent is very rich and forces his child to live in poverty, there will be a lot of issues later in life when he has to explain his selfishness to his deprived child.

Answer by Molly
I agree with Pearl. Why should a child have to wear clothes from the thrift store when the parent gets his/hers at Gucci? It’s the least an absent parent can do after not being there to help raise their own child.

Answer by Grace Under Fire
The actual cost of raising a child. Though I would say that might vary widely by area or lifestyle. For example, if the parents are very wealthy, then what’s considered “normal” would look very different than that of a middle-income couple. I think it should be negotiated, taking many things into account.

Answer by InvincibleFudgePotatoe
i really think child support should not be pressed on , i mean it’s the mother fault for getting pregnant with who ever she slept with , child support is nothing but to get money . The single parent need to know how to support themselves and child , if they can’t support , then adoption . My bio farther use his child support from my mother , on his own personal needs .

Answer by Don’t click on me
why do men hate their child?

Answer by Integration 20
I like the cap Texas law uses.

There’s no reason to hand money over to the custodial parent in order to improve her lifestyle.

If the non custodial parent would like to spend extra on his child, it should not need to be filtered through the mother.

In essence the people of this forum are stating that care for a child goes beyond meeting its needs. The non custodial parent is required to splurge a certain percent of his income on the child by enhancing the mother’s income.

Answer by Brady
I agree with capping child support. Once the child’s basic needs are taken care of, that should be it. Women need to get jobs if they want to live in big houses and drive nice cars. Texas has the right idea!

Home Based Working Mothers – Don’t be Afraid to Ask for Help

Posted in Working Mothers on 11th October 2011

Home Based Working Mothers – Don’t be Afraid to Ask for Help

Being able to work at home is, for many women, the answer to a prayer. Working at home is the solution to the problem of wanting to stay at home and care for their children while still earning an income. Although working at home is the answer to one set of problems, it brings with it another set of problems which have to be resolved if the stay at home mother is going to become a successful home based working mother.

I am, of course, talking about the delicate operation of fitting maternal concerns in alongside a business woman’s preoccupations. If you have been a stay at home mother for some time and are only just now making the transition to being a work at home mother, you will be facing a huge upheaval. In the first few weeks of getting your home business running, you will probably wonder why you ever thought you would be able to cope with looking after the family as well as running a business from home. This is to be expected because you will be trying to live a double life, but you will soon realise that wearing two hats at once won’t work in the home based business woman/stay at home mother world any more than it would as a fashion statement. You have to learn how to separate your roles so that you are only wearing one hat at a time.

The first thing to do is to establish a workable routine which enables you to devote time to your business while ensuring that your partner and children don’t feel left out. Strange though it may sound, this means asking them for help. You probably feel reluctant to do this as it seems like you are putting an extra burden on them but your partner should understand that you are now a family with two working parents and it would be unfair for all the household responsibilities to remain in your shoulders alone.

A request for help like this will usually make your family feel that you are involving them in your life and, because they feel needed instead of being shut out, the help will be given willingly. Your partner and older children will understand that you can’t be expected to do everything on your own and even toddlers will be eager to join in to help with the rest of the family. Being allocated their own chores gives children a sense of responsibility which is something they enjoy from a very early age. Chores like unloading the dishwasher or laying the table for a meal or making beds can easily be delegated; they are only small tasks but, when you are starting your own business, every minute you can call your own counts.

Having enlisted the help of your family, the next thing you need to do is to write out your timetable. The more detailed you can make your timetable, the more help it will be to you, but having a simple daily to-do list will be a great help. A page-a-day diary or calendar is very useful for keeping a record of appointments, vacation dates etc. It is also a good idea to jot down notes of

Child Support Based off Retirement Pay

Posted in Child Support on 22nd February 2011

Child Support Based off Retirement Pay

Article by DadsDivorce


My child support order was based off income I was earning as active duty military. I retired shortly after the order was issued.

Now that I have retired, can my support be reduced based off my lower retirement pay?


The likelihood of obtaining a modification to support or what that modification may be depends on the facts of your case and the laws in your jurisdiction.

Every state will have different guidelines and timelines for child support modifications. Typically a modification to child support is merited when there has been a substantial change in circumstances that would justify a revision.

If your income has changed because you have retired, then you certainly could petition the court to modify the amount of child support that you pay. Other circumstances that justify a modification include a change in the needs of the child and a change in the payer’s earning capacity.

There are many factors that weigh into a modification of support. You should ask yourself whether the court will view this change in your income as voluntary and appear to be an attempt to evade paying support, especially since you obtained a new order right before retiring.

Some questions to consider that may be taken into consideration are whether you were on schedule to retire, or did you retire early? Did you retire at a young age from the military and now plan to (or should) work in the civilian workforce? 

If the answer to any of these questions is yes, then determining what income to use for you for calculating child support may not just be based off of your retirement pay. A judge could impute income to you at what you were earning as an active military member or what you may be expected to earn in the civilian environment.

About the Author

Trisha B. Festerling is an Associate Attorney in the Milwaukee, Wisconsin office of Cordell & Cordell where she practices family law exclusively. Ms. Festerling’s practice is focused on men’s divorce, child support, child custody, paternity and modification. She is licensed in the state of Wisconsin.