HomeChild Careis santa satan?……..details inside!?
Posted in Child Care on 9th February 2012

is santa satan?……..details inside!?
Freehold, Iowa – Satan’s evil plan has created jobs for hundreds of thousands of old lecherous pedophiles throughout this Godly country every December. These filthy homeless hobos just lay on their urine-stained cardboard beds 11 months out of the year, dreaming of Christmas when they can drunkenly traipse into the warmth of departments stores and have innocent little Christian children sit on their vermin-infested laps. Unwary parents happily snap pictures while Satan’s obesely wheezing drunks ask their children whether they’ve been “bad” and whisper lewd suggestions in their angelic little ears with their filthy booze-breath and cigarette-discolored lips. How many unsuspecting tots have suffered a quick grope before Satan’s little helper moves on to the next hopeful child in line?

People think that Halloween is the time of year that Satan dresses up, but this is just flat-out wrong. See? The Devil will always try to fool you! Halloween is when Satan delights in watching humans dress in ways that will ensure them entry into the Devil’s realm. But it is Christmas time that the Devil saves for himself! It is then when he puts on his most devious costume! And it takes no Sherlock Holmes to see that the Devil’s annual disguise is none other than Santa! He even wears his favorite color — demon red. Even his last name, “Claus,” is Olde English for “hoof-claws.” Lucifer may be the wiliest of all the deceitful demons that ever drew breath of fire in Hell, but he was pretty sloppy when he decided to try to spoil our Savior’s birthday with this disguise. His big devil ego got the better of him when he decided to name his Christmas Anti-Christ after himself. He just moved around the letters in the name, “Satan,” into a sonogram and got “Santa.” Well, this is to put Prince of Darkness on notice: We are on to you Satan! And we unmask you and heartily rebuke you! Get thee hence from our Christ’s birthday party!

Satan once was God’s favorite angel. But he tried a heavenly coup and God should have by all rights killed him right then and there. But God, being all that is good, gave him his very own place to rule and called it Hell. And even though God gave Satan free reign to tempt as many people as he wanted (even Christ Himself!) and lots of fabulous stuff to tempt them with (like eternal youth and Lincoln Continentals), Satan was still not satisfied. It made him jealous that Americans have made Christmas the most important retail event of the year, far overshadowing Satan’s own holiday, Halloween. So Satan has tried to undermine Christmas by making Santa even more popular than Jesus!

You don’t think so? Even the law of the land forbids a baby Jesus in the town square, but who is there instead? You guessed it! Santa! Every time a so-called Christian child asks Santa for something, he is praying to Satan. With each request fulfilled, parents are unwittingly making a pact with the Devil. They may as well be writing in blood, “Satan please distract our children from Jesus with all these shiny toys!” But you know what? When your little boys and girls have grown up and no longer believe that Santa is real, they will find out just how real Satan is when he comes to collect their souls in exchange for all those presents! And God will turn a deaf ear to their pathetic wails of desperation. God will say, “You were more interested in that fat demon who was giving you presents than my Son who was giving you salvation, so you can all rot in Hell for all I care.”

So talk to your children before it is too late! Tell them that Santa is no kindly old man; he is an evil demon. And next time your family sees some propped up gin-soaked vagrant in a Mall wearing a red suit with white furry cuffs, set a good example and witness for the other deluded people waiting in line. Loudly, rebuke him! Announce to all the children in the store “Not only is Santa a lie, he will ravage you sexually, drink your blood and drag your palpating carcasses down to Hell with him!” It is only through setting a good example that we can put the Christ back in Christmas.

Best answer(s):

Answer by Yar…
Yes and dogs are secretly gods.

Answer by Maurog III
Dude, it’s all make belief just like Satan and God.

Stop challenging the faith of children, they’re not challenging yours.

Answer by evil
GAWD i knew it since childhood he gets a bag full of love toys and shouts HO HO HOE

Answer by joyann
You are wierd. God does not turn his back on his children. God knows Santa came from the legend of Saint Nicholas in Europe.You maybe some fundametalist Christian but your views are so distorted. Why are Santas lewd anddrunk old men? Most Santas where i come from are lovely people. They are professional people who are screened by police etc. Know this. God cares for the children and the parents. So let them get on with Christmas as the celebration of Christ’s birth with joy and love in their hearts that was put there by God. God is a loving God not one who reeks vengeance on small children for being given some toys. I bet he sees it as a season of forgiveness, kindness and love. His son taught his message. So take your hellfire and brimstone philosophies elsewhere. PS- dont you dare tel mee i will go to hell unless you yourself are God as he alone knows.

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