HomeChild CareHow do you deal with a 13 year old who thinks….?
Posted in Child Care on 28th April 2012

How do you deal with a 13 year old who thinks….?
everyone hates her, especially her siblings & kids at school. She use to be a happy girl but now she just seems depressed about school, we have tried to seek help at diffrent agency’s but they say they will call back and we don’t hear fom them (Ontario) she was cutting, but now she has stop that….we show her love & attention and praise her when she does well and accomplish things that can be hard for her….alot of the times she says “I don’t care” when she don’t get her way, she lies to her friends she also tells them she hates life, what else can i do to help her with this problem? I’m a mom who is at there wits end….and i don’t like the systems here, it seems when a child is crying for help, they slam the door in your face

Best answer(s):

Answer by buggs8498
did something happen to her that affected her emotionally?

Answer by tabithap
I don’t know how Canada’s mental health system works, but that child needs to see a therapist NOW. You just descriped me at 13, and trust me, she hasn’t stopped cutting, she’s just hiding it, and if she says she hates her life, she’s on her way to suicide. I know, I tried that at 14. Do whatever you have to, but get her to a therapist, and get her on anti-depressants.

Answer by Sarah M
All of us go thru that, try to get her into something she might like (band, sports, working) and then support her in that.

Answer by amy
Don’t give up on her. She’s a teenager. Remember how weird you were as a teenager. Try to recall how difficult it was for you b/c I’m sure it was…adolescence is hard on everyone. Be patient and try to listen to her.

Answer by lupe s
You should get help from a specialist as soon as possible this is not good. It can be depression. Get help before her situation gets worst.

Answer by Mark T
Have you tried asking her if she would like to speak either to you or a counsellor?

Sounds like something has happened to shatter her confidence / self-esteem (“everyone hates her”).

Has someone close to her died / moved away / jilted her ?

Young love / crushes can be mighty powerful things – more so than most adults can remember / appreciate.

Answer by monkey_kins
If she’s crying for help, why aren’t you being the one to help rather than sending her to someone. I’d say dig in and really try to talk honestly to her and see what she is feeling, what is making her feel this way and get to know what type of person she is and what will make her happy. Something is bothering her, you find out.

Answer by lady
Be there. Day in,day out. Listen! Make her feel that you will NEVER give up on her. Ever! Keep asking for help from others-her pediatrician,school counselors,call the agencies over and over again. Be the squeaky wheel. You are your daughter’s strongest advocate and……SHE NEEDS YOU!
Good Luck!

Answer by Barbiq
Is she crying for help or just attention? Could it be that she is just experiencing really bad hormone fluctuation’s? (major PMS?)
Have you talked to your doctor and asked his recommendations If programs won’t call you back…call them and make them crazy until they help you!! How about getting her in group activities? Is she busy after school or in the evenings or weekends? Does she lay around bored or lonely all weekend? How is her weight and exercises level? Maybe getting her involved in a sport might help. Or involved in music….

I hope things get better for you and your daughter. I know it is hard seeing your daughter hurt…but you will get through it together…just hang in there and keep trying. Don’t give up! 🙂

Answer by Sandy
I can help here.

You are approaching this in the wrong manner, I believe.
Firstly, contact your Primary care physician and meet with the Physician face to face. The physician is under a moral and ethical obligation to assist you to find immediate help.

You appear to be in Canada from your question. Your child is in distress to be sure. She needs immediate help from professionals. Children are not born bad or born to behave badly.

You daughter is experiencing hormone changes and all sorts of peer and family pressures, She is screaming for help.

This is all about your child… Your daughter.

I am not slamming any door in your face. My email is available for you to contact me.

One day you will look back at this problem and know that people are there to support you.

God Bless.

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