HomeChild Supportdivorced dads do you pay “extra” for things that should be covered under “child support”?
Posted in Child Support on 11th June 2011

divorced dads do you pay “extra” for things that should be covered under “child support”?
What i mean is if you pay the max the court ordered(child support,daycare,and medical expensives) plus have joint custody 50% do u pay for extra things like sports fees,toys/clothes for your ex’s house ect?My husbands ex will have thier son call and ask his dad to pay for these things and he allways does.Now money is very tight for us and his ex is not hard up.Now i’m not an evil stepmom(i love my stepson) and my hus is not a dead beat dad i just feel these things should come from the child support money my hus is allready paying her.i feel his ex is taking advantage of my husbands love for his son as this happens often.Should i just let this go?I have tryed to talk to him about it but he just get defensive.

Best answer(s):

Answer by Nicole C
Let it go.. its his child, just because he pays child support, doesnt mean he needs to flea from everything else.. my dad paid extra child support and then paid for everything else we wanted.. just kind of a “hey, b/c im not around as much as Id like to be” sort of thing.

Answer by zajucomom
Let it go. He doesn’t want to talk about it. But i do see your point.

Answer by Scullycj
fight it! Should be covered..

Answer by jay k
It’s likely he gets defensive because he’s doing what’s right for the best of the children. After all what would result out of him telling his wife that the money he pays should cover that as well. Chances are it will provoke an argument and the kids the true one who pays for it. However, morally speaking you are correct. If he has joint custody AND pays child support he should not have to pay other things as well, after all if he has his child for 50% and probably spends just as much as his mom does for her 50%. This sounds like it might be an issue you should check with a lawyer on, and then once you get the facts you can bring it up to him.

Answer by Violet Pearl
That sounds fair enough to me. If they were still married, the parents would work together to come up with the things the children need. Child support goes toward food, clothing and shelter (medical insurance, etc.) and a decent father also buys his kid toys, sports fees, etc.
Let it go. He shouldn’t have to defend his decision to buy his kid a toy.

Answer by Eric W
Money maybe tight, but it is his son. I pay extra for my kids, but I will not give her the money to “buy” the extras. I keep a receipt because she is insane.

Answer by manybagolike
Hell no! The state tells you what you have to pay. Not her! She’s robbing you man! But it doesn’t hurt to buy your kids stuff yourself like clothes and toys. Your still their father. Just don’t be giving her the money. If she says they need something like clothes or something, pay for it yourself!

Answer by topekat
Good question. I would say that if you are already paying the court ordered and you are straped for cash that you shouldnt have to pay anything extra unless you have the money to do so it is your step child and that doesnt matter. If you can pay it do it if not dont.

Answer by jen_808
I agree with you. My husband has a daughter and I am the evil step monster also that hates it when they ask for extra money. Child support should cover those costs, but I guess there is nothing wrong with giving a little extra once in awhile. We are not well off either and every little bit counts.

Answer by mable3691214
Let it go. Child support only goes so far. It doesnt pay for thoes extra things… If yuor husband wasnt paying for them, He would not be able to get them.

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