HomeChild SupportChild Support while father is in Military ?
Posted in Child Support on 9th August 2012

Child Support while father is in Military ?
I have a daughter of one year . Her father is in training in hawaii . He sends her and has been send her about 100$ every month ` since shes been 2 months old. He never labeled the money as being “child support” but i guess thats what it is . We never went to court or anything .. so yeah ! I wanna know if he will start paying child support without me telling/making him pay . Will the army force him without me having to say anything about it ? Please let me know , if you have an idea (:
I dont wanna have to FORCE him to pay . i thought that the army would make him pay , and i wouldnt have to be the ” BAD GUY ” asking for child support . and i also dont want problems with him . We worked things out .. and this is just NOT a topic we ever bring up ! šŸ™
So if i get a court order for him to pay c.s and then call his command whatever , than get a DNA test and ect ect . than he will start paying c.s ? i dont wanna be greedy and ask for such and such so does the army send me a certain amount ? AND are you guys SUREE he wont get introuble ? should i talk to him about this first before i go to court and all that ??
and also ` He finished his training .. so he got stationed in hawaii . He said hes gotta do more training for about 9 more months .. will i be able to do all this even tho were not in the same state !
Does anyone suggest a way i should tell him `. so we can both agree on him paying child support ? im scared that its just going to cause problems . We havnt had the best relationship since our daughters been born . we both split an just recently we got back together . i just dont want alllll this to go bad and then things go back to how it used to be . its not good for our daughter or US ! šŸ™

Best answer(s):

Answer by john
Uhm, yes, contact his command, and DEERs. Other wise it’s on you.

Answer by Drixnot
Go to court, he is only sending $ 100 in the hope that it will keep you from getting a support order. Basically he is paying a fraction of what he should be. Once you go to court the military will make sure the gets to you.

Answer by Steven Montero
There’s two ways to go here. The real question would be is the $ 100 an arrangement you two set up? If not, talk to him about it, but if he’s not willing to help you out some more then move to option 2. Option 2: Yes you can call his command and they will make him pay you, however there might be some nasty consequences involved there. An ambitious commander may demote him or charge him for “conduct unbecoming”, which could result in a demotion, loss of pay, etc. It would all depend on how you paint the scenario for him. He can easily set up a direct deposit that will come out of his check before he gets it that will go straight to you. Either way it’s in both of your interests to resolve it with each other and not involve a 3rd party. If necessary your priority lies with your daughter and you should contact his command if he’s being a deadbeat dad. Hope this helps!

Answer by acidBURN
The Army won’t “make” him pay anything unless you have a court order stating that he owes so much in child support. If you just call up his command and say that he needs to pay up, then his command will ask for proof that he is the father AND that he owes so much to pay. Aside from that, you and he are free to set up any arrangements you both agree upon.

Answer by Tom B
Is the child on his page 2 (as in is he receiving bah for her)? He he listed on the birth cert. as the father? Is there any court ordered support? If you contact his command these are the questions that you are going to be asked, along with do you have proof that he is the father cause if he isn’t on the birth cert. then a DNA test may be required. Otherwise no the military will not get involved. (They may strongly suggest that he man up, but they can’t force him to without the proof and/or court order) However, if you have the proof/court order the child can be put on his page 2 and enrolled in DEERS and be eligible for medical through the military as a dependent along with the support check.
edit: He will either have to A.take leave to be present at the hearing or B.Hire a lawyer in whatever state you are in to represent him in court. And no he will not get in trouble unless he does not pay. Trust me he is not the first one to have a child and not be married nor will he be the last. If he is already listed as the father on the birth cert. then no I don’t think a DNA test will be required unless requested by either party or ordered by the court. Yes, since you 2 appear to have a amicable relationship concerning the child then I think a heads up is in order. In the end though it is the welfare of the child that is important so if some feelings get bruised along the way, so be it…

Answer by Hugo
It would be great if you could talk to him and you both agree on a fair amount for your daughter but there is nothing that requires him to pay you anything. The only thing that will force him to pay a fair amount of child support is a court order. The Army can’t make him do anything without a court order. Right now, all that you have is his good will.

Answer by mustangsally76
The military cannot force him to pay you anything without a court order. He doesn’t even have to send you the $ 100. Take him to Court. It’s not a question of beng a good guy or bad guy, it’s what is best for the child you share. He will not have any problems with themilitary because he has to pay child support. Many members pay child support with no issues at all.

EDIT: You would have no reason to call his commander. The military doesn’t even get involved really. The Court Orders child supoort and he will set up an automatic allotment so that the amount of mony that court orders him to pay is automatically taken from his pay and deposited into your account. The only, only time the military becomes involved is if he doesn’t pay the support order. He will not get in trouble for having to pay child support. The amount of the support is up to the court not the military. It would be nice of you to give him a heads up on taing him to court. He has to submit certain documents in order to show how much money he makes and it would be nice of you to let him know so he can get everything in order. It’s not neccessary for you to tell him but it would be a nice gesture.

Answer by Jane_S
Like some people have said, this is not a matter of being a “bad guy” or “good guy.” It is the child’s right to be supported by both parents. It is not your place nor the father’s to determine if and how much the child should be supported. The courts have a system in which they determine how much he should be paying and if the father is a mature person, he should know that you are doing this for his and your child’s best interest. Your daughter also has the right to be covered under his health insurance. This is something you do need to bring up for your daughter’s sake. How do you know things are not going to change? What if he gets married, what if you get married? Let him know before filing the paperwork, if he’s a good father he should support it. You can do this at your state. It doesn’t matter which state he’s in, the child is in your state. Paternity (if disputed) will be established when the court asks for a test. If it’s not disputed by the father, then the courts will proceed without the test, been through it myself.

Answer by Donald
The military can’t MAKE a member pay child support. Only the courts can do that. The courts will decide how much child support he should pay and if he’s smart, he’ll make out an allotment so he won’t fail to pay it. However, a member’s command can make him WISH he paid it. My father paid child support for 3 of us. He didn’t have to keep the same amount coming in when I turned 18 or my sister turned 18 but he never lowered the amount. He kept an allotment going to my mother for us. He finally stopped when my brother turned 18. He might have been a worthless butt head, but he did pay child support…more and longer than he needed to.

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