HomeChild Carechild support question?
Posted in Child Care on 1st September 2011

child support question?
child support question?
Ok my fiance’ has a two yr old daughter with another woman. He has been buying her presents, diapers, all different kinds of baby items since she was born. We have saved some of the receipts for things, but werent smart enough to save all of them, (we kept the info. for the diamond earrings, and bigger ticket items but not for the diapers, food, playpen, stroller, etc. etc.) His ex is denying him any unsupervised visitation since day one. At first we were understanding about this (new baby, new mother, breastfeeding etc.) but recently she has been saying that “he has to really prove he cares” to get any visits with her at all! Not only that, but the mother’s bf of about 1 1/2 yr. is now his little girl’s “daddy”-and he is a sperm donor. She is unstable, and angry that he wouldnt come back to her after they broke up.

So we are going to take it to court, we were trying to save up for a lawyer but are tired of waiting (her family is rich and she lives with them-they support her, the bf, and the daughter…they dont have jobs…we live in our own place with our son and pay our own bills, etc.) so we are just going to go ahead and petition for visitation w/o a lawyer…(go to the clerk of courts for paperwork?)

We have learned enough to know he will not be denyed visitation. He is a GREAT father. Unfortunately, his daughter hasnt gotten the chance to know that. (the visits have been working around mother’s schedule, for a few short hours sporradically since birth, with her and her bf there the whole time)

We have offered to pay child support many times to her, but she keeps saying that he has to sign HIMSELF up for it (she is confused and thinks that he has to pay child support to get visitation…even though we have both told her that is not the case), yet we are still willing to pay it anyhow (its the responsible thing to do) ….We have her recorded saying all these things as well, among many other horrible spiteful things.

Now, I thought we would only be paying support from the time we signed him up for it (can we do that??) but i am starting to wonder whether we will have to pay from the time of birth (she recently said that everything we have done before “wont matter”) is this true? We are in the state of Ohio. Any advice or comments before we go ahead with this? How much will the court/filing fees be?

also note: I say “we” b/c i have helped to pay for all of these things, and been there for all of the visits, am privy to all information. I am not overly involved, i try to stay out of it (she kind of scares me). OH, and the two were never married.

Best answer(s):

Answer by WorriedAJ
You really need a lawyer to handle this since you said the girl’s parents are weathly. You can easily find a lawyer who will let you make monthly payments to cover the bill. Filing for joint custody is the way to go.

Answer by Anonymous
Yeah you really do need to find a lawyer because if she is so wealthy she may owe you support payments, not the other way around.

Answer by You asked so…
You should stay out of it. You are considered a third party in this matter. The father should apply for custody/visitation or get an attorney to do it for him. The court’s website in your county can tell you what the filing fees are.

People don’t realize that custody and child support are two different things. You aren’t paying to see a child, you are paying because you brought another human being on this earth. When he applies for custody/visitation, child support should be ordered. Anything given to a child outside of child support is considered a gift. I suggest reducing the expensive gifts for a kid if you two can’t afford it. Better yet, spend the money on a good attorney.

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