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2010 December - Baby-sitting & Childcare

Why would somebody file for visitation and joint custody of their child?

Posted in Child Care on 31st December 2010

Why would somebody file for visitation and joint custody of their child?
and then after the first court date, visit with the child a few times, then start to not show up every time..then not show up to a court date, and then not show up to the second court date?

I hope that doesn’t sound confusing. Do you think he could have done this to try to seem like he cares about his son even though he really doesn’t? I should add, this all came about after I took him to court for not paying child support. He was $ 6000 in arears and I was tired of it. They put him on probation, and he started to pay. So maybe this was to show his p.o that he “cares”?

Okay, and one more question..last I heard, he had quit his job. I havent received child support in a few months, and this is violating both the court and his probation. Should I take him back to court, or should I not even bother? I’ll add again that I have a husband who takes care of my son, my son calls him daddy..he’s been there for him and will continue to do so, so we really don’t even want my ex’s money..

Sorry that this was so long guys! It’s just that I just got back from court and am frustrated. Thanks in advance for reading this and giving your input!
By the way, the judge dismissed the case since he hasn’t showed up these past 2 times, so I no longer have to allow him to see my son..unless he decides to take me back to court
The visitation case was dismissed. The jusge said I don’t have to let him see him if I don’t want to because there is no order for it. I have full custody.

We tried getting him to sign over his rights, but he just got angry and said no. Meanwhile, this past September was the first time he’s seen our son in 3 years

Best answer(s):

Answer by whoknew?!?!
He’s a worthless jerk, he obviously doesn’t care. Your little guy is soooooooo much better of without him. My mom raised 3 girls all on here own, and we are all happy and successful.
Good LUCK!!!!!!

Answer by Amy
family law is a very sticky situation. i went through all of this when i was growing up and had to fight my ex. ultimately, it really depends on the laws of your state on what you can and can’t do legally. i know in indiana, you cannot withhold your child to the other parent if there is a visitation/custody agreement. it doesn’t matter if they are current on their child support or not. BUT he would be in contempt of court by not paying his support while on probation (they have to be “law abiding” while on probation). most child support divisions are overwhelmed and you really have to keep on them. report every non-payment. they’ll eventually pick him up.

“I’ll add again that I have a husband who takes care of my son, my son calls him daddy..he’s been there for him and will continue to do so, so we really don’t even want my ex’s money..”….would your ex be willing to sign over rights to your husband so your son can have a real dad?

Answer by Ellie BatMILF
It’s all a game to him. He is bringing you back in to court and jerking you around because he knows he can and there is nothing you can do about it. If you are serious about not wanting his money…and because I know a little about your situation…you might want to consider just ignoring him completely. Let him lapse on his payments, don’t take him back to court…and then after a year of no contact file to terminate his parental rights. I can even help you with the petition if you need me to. I’ve done a few of them for my county and I’m sure the petitions for yours are similar since it is all the same Family law in our state.

Answer by Me ILF
I would let his PO know and try to get the child support. If nothing else you can put it away for him for a car or toward collage.
The least his father can do is pay for his child, even tho he has nothing to do with him. Why should he get away scott free!
I have a friend who hasn’t see a child support check in 3 years but the father take his kids every weekend and for weeks at a time in the summer and is very involved with his children so she doesn’t push the issue. I don’t blame her, at least he is involved and does buy them cloths when they need it and takes them school shopping.
Oh and he is a contractor (privet) so no one can just take it out of his check and with work having its ups and downs sometimes money is good with him and other times not.

Answer by Busy Mommy
I think he’s doing it because he can, and to “prove” in his mind that he cares. He sounds selfish and immature, how wonderful you and your son were able to move on to a better situation.

Answer by Bullwinkle BILF
He stopped caring for one reason or another. It does not matter why as he wont tell you the truth either way. Suffice to say he stopped caring.

I would allow the authorities to take him back to court. No need for you to do so unless the authorities will not do so AND unless you know where he is working. If you take him back to court without his work info then you face him when he may lie.

Answer by ♥Mrs Chαrlí♥
It is good he didn’t turn up then Rosie.

Why don’t you apply for the Courts to terminate his Parental rights, so your Hubby can adopt him?
I don’t know if that will work or not.

I think your X is just trying to get at you. He sees how happy your family is and is jealous, so tries to make you unhappy.

Good Luck Rosie

Minimizing Working Mothers? Sacrifices: The Power of Making Money Online

Posted in Working Mothers on 31st December 2010

Minimizing Working Mothers? Sacrifices: The Power of Making Money Online

Before the start of WWII, women traditionally didn’t work outside the home. But, once the U.S. entered WWII, the government realized they needed a larger workforce to build supplies needed to fight the war. Since a large number of our country’s men were over seas serving in the war, the U.S. government began a campaign to recruit women into the work force.

Over the decades, more and more women have gone to work; some out of necessity and others out of a need to do for themselves without being dependent on a man for their needs and wants. But, the same women who now work in all types of jobs and professions are the same women who are, and who want to be, mothers. Because of this duality, many women are forced to make sacrifices that affect areas of their professional and personal lives.

They often have to choose between spending time with their children, or making the money they need to pay the bills. And because the bills have to get paid, this sometimes means working mothers miss out on important events in their children’s lives like sports games and school performances. And, when mothers have to be home with their children due to an illness, or for any of the other reasons that keep mothers home with their children, working mothers sacrifice the money they’d make that day; putting a financial strain on the family.

It’s because of these major sacrifices that many women today are choosing to work from home; making money on the internet. Working from home and making money on the internet allows working mothers the freedom to not have to make so many sacrifices. Making money on the internet allows them to be home with their children at all times, while earning the money needed to support their families.

As technology continues to advance, making money on the internet becomes easier and easier. The profitable opportunities for a home business that’s run entirely from a virtual office on the internet are limitless. There are tons of people making money on the internet through online auctions, creating websites for people, helping businesses market their products and services, and many more.

If a woman wants, or needs, to work while raising a family, making money on the internet is definitely high on the list of ways to earn a living. This isn’t to say that making money on the internet will totally eliminate the sacrifices working mothers have to make because it won’t. Making money on the internet from the comfort of one’s own home has its definite advantages, but it’s a job like any other job and the work has to get done if the money is going to be made.

What making money on the internet does do is offer working mothers the ability to be in control of when they work and for how long. If a child has a baseball game on Saturday and the mother wants to go, she can put in a few extra hours making money on the internet on Friday night and not have to worry on Saturday morning about

Why are the wives of the guys I work with so mean to me?

Posted in Working Mothers on 31st December 2010

Why are the wives of the guys I work with so mean to me?
I am 25 years old, I have been working in a law firm of one of my dad’s friends for about 6 monthes. I am married, and I have a 3 month old little girl. I am the only woman who works at the firm as an attorney and the youngest there, most of the guys are 30+. During my six monthes there, there have been several parties and social functions connected to the firm. During the last monthes, the wives of the other members have become very mean to me. Most of them are housewives who have never worked a day in thier lives. They totally exclude me, one called me a “bad mother” even though my husband is a stay at home dad and an ausome father! They always knitpick at me, saying nasty remarks about my clothing, look etc. There was a party that one of them held for all of the wives of the firm, and I wasn’t even invited, they completely exluded me. I don’t get what is going on?? I am always very nice and get a long with all of the guys that I work with very well. Why are these women so mean?
I don’t wear suggestive clothing, I am a lawyer, I generally wear a skirt suit.

Best answer(s):

Answer by SHORTY
tHEIR JUST HATING.

Answer by tim2755
you must be hot! they’re jealous

Answer by HONORARIUS
Jealousy…

Answer by Dawn
Maybe because you give the men a come on. Wear suggestive clothes or get way to familiar with the men. That’s why they like you. They are thinking, not to long and I’ll get some free sex.
Wives usually know someone they can’t trust.
Maybe you need to change your attitude.

Answer by Lyssa
They feel threatened, you may be married and have children but women know how some women can be scandalous, and im not saying your like that, but all it is is jealousy on thier part, and worry because you are the only women there and thier husbands are all working with you, it’s sick, but theres not much you can do, even if you are nice to them.. my best advice would be just let them be mean, you know your a better person anyways.

Answer by Bassetlover
There is your problem, you get along with their husbands. You are a threat. Alot of women can’t handle women in power positions (caddy yes, fair no). Maybe because they stay home and don’t work they are bored and have nothing better to do then sit around and chew the fat about “that woman” at the office. Don’t worry, unfortunately you will run into this the rest of your life don’t let their petty behaviour bother you.

Answer by luvlisteningtomusic
You want to think they are jelouse of you and you want us all to write that. We are not in your situation so therefore we do not know why these women think that way. Maybe there is a story going around about you and thier husbands told them. Maybe you are dressing way to sexy in the office and it scares them a bit. If my husband was working with a bunch of women and I knew this woman was attractive I would get to know her before I judged her in any way.

Answer by Michelle
You just might be prettier than all of them. More successful, happier maybe, They might be jealous of your life. Or maybe the guys working there are saying that their wives should be more like you. It has to be a jealousy thing.

Answer by cgspitfire
One, you’re young and working in a law firm with all men. Most of them probably treat you like a kid sister or a daughter which is probably irritating the wives. You’re considered a threat to them and you’ll have to deal with that if you’re going to continue to work there. Don’t let their attitudes bring you down. Hold your head up and maintain your sense of self worth.

I deal with doctors and attorneys and most of them have god complexes, but the wives who are at home all of the time are the most insecure people I’ve ever encountered. They have no sense of reality and if you’re younger and better looking than they are, watch out for claws!

Answer by Valerie
girl, I didn’t even FINISH reading what you wrote….I already know where its going. ITS JEALOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Same thing here at the company I work for…..these damn businessmens wives are insecure bit$ $ idiots. Look lady, we don’t want your damn married husband!

At company functions, these dumb broads (who all look the same, mind you) treat us women that work with tier husbands like second class citizens…AND ITS OUR COMPANY FUNCTION- NOT THEIRS!!!!

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